The extraordinary thing about sex (other than the climaxes, obviously) is that on the off chance that you commit an error or something unbalanced occurs, you can generally chuckle about it later.
Have you at any point given a penis massage in an Uber and lost your nose ring? Shouldn't something be said about doing it in a J.Crew washroom while the garments chaperon was directly outside? No? Well, these genuine ladies have—and they're willing to impart their most interesting stories to you. Trust me, you're in for a giggle.
In case you're not either in tears in the wake of understanding this or prepared to chance some prison time during your next sexual experience, read it once more. These 50 ladies have gambled it for The Big O...you should attempt it at some point.
Funny Sex Stories One
"I was hooking up with this dude for months, but it wasn't consistent, so when I went over to his place I realized when I got there that I was not, let's just say, 100-percent prepared down there. I explained the situation to the dude and gave him two options. 'We can roll with it, or you can let me borrow your razor, with a totally new razor head' (because duh, bacteria!).
He opted for the second choice. And I hopped in the shower, still drunk, and shaved everything. How I didn't slip in the shower or cut myself while drunk is beyond me, but mission accomplished...and the sex after was actually the best ever with that guy, so yeah!"
Writer: Heather R., 26
Funny Sex Stories Two
"I was hooking up with this guy for about three months, but he would always come to my place since I lived near the town center with all the bars.
But one night, I finally went to his house to hookup, and when I went to the bathroom to clean up afterward, I noticed a bunch of kid's clothes on the floor and a small toothbrush. Turns out, he had a whole child. Three months and I never knew!"
Writer: Melanie C., 24
Funny Sex Stories Three
"It was the night of my boyfriend's fraternity formal. We were having a good time when he asked me if I wanted to sneak away from the dance floor. We ran to the men's bathroom, picked a stall, and started having sex.
That was until three of his brothers came in to use the bathroom. They started chatting it up at the urinals. And we were just in the stall, naked, trying to remain as quiet as possible. That's when I snapped back into reality and realized how disgusting this bathroom was. I've never questioned my life choices more."
Writer: Amber G., 24
Funny Sex Stories Four
"When I first moved to Brooklyn, I came across an NSFW profile on Tumblr with this guy who was popular for the sloppy head he gives. So I was scrolling through his profile and came across a post that said something like, 'Repost this if you’re based in New York.' So being new and unknown to the city, I said, hey, why the hell not...and messaged him.
A day or so later, we ended meeting up at a Mexican-themed bar. After a few margaritas, we went to a restaurant. When we got to the booth, we instantly began making out and um... exploring each other’s bodies. So we slipped out before the waiter came back and went into the alley right next to the bar. He sat me on a random car parked in the alley and showed me exactly how he became so Tumblr famous."
Writer: Sharice F., 25
Funny Sex Stories Five
"One Friday afternoon in the office, my coworker was venting about not having been on a date in a while. I motivated her to try her luck on Tinder. She eventually met a guy she liked, they chatted for a bit, and he asked her out. But he wanted to know if she had a friend for his friend in town. Of course, I agreed to be her wing woman. We met up at a lounge and laughed the whole night. But my friend wanted to head home because she had work the next morning.
"After they dropped her off, I chose to stay and hang out with the two guys. Initially, I was only dancing with the date I was set up with, but after a few rum punches, we were all taking turns dancing together. We took a break and went outside to cool off. Outside, me and my original date began making out. After we stopped, I noticed his friend was just standing there. I asked if he wanted to join and soon I started making out with my coworkers' date. Shortly after, we all went to a hotel and that’s the story of my first threesome."
Writer: Serena B., 25
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